Mixing NA Beverages and Sobriety

Dry January, removing alcohol from one’s life during the first month of the year, can seem excruciatingly long for those trying on a sober lifestyle. 31 days to be exact. It’s an experiment that’s grown tremendously since its start in 2012. The original initiative by Alcohol Change UK intended to help people ditch the hangover, reduce the waistline, and save some serious money by giving up alcohol for 31 days. It did not assume the label of “alcoholic” and it welcomed a full spectrum of gray-area drinkers and sober-curious folks.

With seven years of continuous sobriety myself this January 2022, I never joined the Dry January movement to test out sobriety. My sobriety wasn’t conveniently timed with a month, rather a deep, alarming wake-up call that sobriety was wholly necessary at an inconvenient moment in late July 2014 (read: A Baffling Breakup).

Because an individual comes to Dry January in so many ways from heavily sober necessary to lightly sober curious, it’s important to provide a safe space for all of it. The Minneapolis Star Tribune hosted a Facebook Group for Dry January this year where 1.1K people came together to question their drinking and hear from others, essentially to know they’re not alone. The group led conversations around the immediate to long-term positive physical effects of not drinking, and members shared their experiences of trying to order non-alcoholic beverages at local restaurants – a feat that did not always end well.

I could appreciate the FB group shares about just how much sober experiences at bars and restaurants are a miss. They’re awkward, inconvenient, and unsupported in many spaces, even those that offer up a hidden NA cocktail or two. A sad statement in a slew of a 10-page alcoholic menu. Definitely room for improvement!

Proxy Bar

This improvement, or should I say, amazing alternative, arrived in my FB messenger on January 6: Jen, you must come to Proxy Bar at the Food Building in NE Mpls for our Dry January series over four Fridays in January. It was a message from Lisa Kane, noting my recent announcement about my enews on sobriety and inquiry: WingingIt, and posts about the need for better sober experiences at bars, restaurants, and events.

In a Dry January dream come true, I made it to three of the four experiences. I went solo for two and connected with an amazing like-minded community. For the final Friday in the series, I brought a friend, Sarah Souder Johnson, co-founder of the non-profit Dissonance. The experience was so welcoming -- it offered great food and tastings of non-alcoholic spirits and brews in a swanky adult atmosphere. And so many good conversations.

An important conversation rose to the surface early in the month: can anyone in early sobriety or with any length of sobriety enjoy NA beverages without it triggering a desire for the alcoholic version? In other words, are NA beverages a threat to sobriety?

It’s worth noting that the creators of Proxy Bar aren’t necessarily catering to the sober crowd, although they are fully speaking my language of a #SoberNotSomber good time! They’re more generalists in that they’re creating NA alternatives that are crafted, beautiful and delightful, and satisfying for those who seek the taste without the ethanol and wish to be more well (i.e. avoid hangovers, have better relationships, be more productive, etc).

To Explore NA or Not?

Proxy Bar (or any similar experience) for a certain subset of DJ’ers or those with longer amounts of sobriety, was a bright highlight in what might have been an otherwise white-knuckling month of abstinence. It was an opportunity to explore the expanding and mind-blowing world of non-alcoholic cocktails and brews. For other subsets of those exploring Dry January or early in sobriety, imbibing in NA cocktails and beer might have been confusing and threatening to the necessary long-term sobriety their sanity demands.

I don’t have any hard and fast rules about determining if any particular individual practicing sobriety might be triggered or not by an NA beverage. I do know that in early sobriety (year one), I steered way clear of NA alternatives to ensure I could avoid the question or possible trigger that would jeopardize my sobriety. This meant I didn’t drink them at home or out and about – no in any situation. It’s worth noting that at that time I also feared a white wine reduction in a pasta entrée.

As I learned to navigate un-sober spaces in years two and three, I built more confidence in my ability to be in those environments and creatively find my way to a respectable NA beverage. By year four, I stepped into comfort in social settings and conversations with wait staff about NA options. This felt like solid ground to test out my first NA beer in years. It went down well. I liked the taste but I was relieved to discover that after years of sober work, I could uncouple that taste with the need to feel alcohol’s relaxing and spirited effects.

Many in AA will say never to the NA. I completely get that and if you’re in that camp – stay there. You know yourself. If you do ever experiment, start with something far away from your past favorite alcoholic beverage. Mine was a buttery Chardonnay, so experimenting with NA beer felt safer. Now, there are even amazing NA alternatives that mimic a Manhattan or Gin ‘n Tonic to a T – as experienced at Proxy Bar. So sober friends, go into your to explore or not to explore assessment with eyes and senses wide open.

What does truly excite me about NA options is the impact these will make in society by normalizing non-drinking. I want that for generations to come. Today, I am grateful for event venue owners, and bar and restaurant owners’ willingness to create better sober spaces and offerings including Kieran Folliard of The Food Building; makers like Marco Zappia of 3Leche and Peder Schweigert of DryWit and the amazing NA creations they’re dreaming up; and technology and process experts like Ben Jordan of ABV Technology.

-- NA Cheers, friends, and I look forward to more amazing and sober-supported experiences in the MSP community!